Thunderstorm Anxiety

I love thunderstorms. I have always loved thunderstorms.

The last summer I worked as a camp counselor, we had series of tornado warnings and during the worst one of the season, everyone in camp was huddled in the cellar beneath the dining hall. 150 scared kids and 20 staff singing their throats out.  Nothing beats a good repeat after me song when trying to distract an 11 year old. We were missing a couple campers (who later turned up in the bathroom upstairs), so one of the staff had to search all the cabins to find them. I happily volunteered. I love storms. The sky was a shade of green I hope to never see again and trees were down all over the place - but if I'm being honest, that search made for one of the most invigorating and awesome afternoons I have ever had. I love storms.

My dog, however, does not.

I don't know if its just ingrained in her because she's a small dog or because or if it’s because she was a stray living on the streets for the first year of her life, but oh my god- she does not like thunder. I bought her a ThunderShirt and that has made a difference, but she is still so anxious during storms that I feel incredibly helpless. I've tried everything; the calming tablets, RescueRemedy drops, I close the curtains, put on fans or my ac to drown out the sounds and last night- a new low for my personal well being - we "slept" with the lights and radio on.

Last month during a storm, my little chi-weenie discovered her inner cat and climbed up to the top of my bookcase – maybe she was trying to surrender to the lightning gods and was trying to get closer to Zeus himself to be offered as a sacrifice- or perhaps, despite living on the top floor of our building she was just seeking higher ground... who knows. But last night- wrapped in her ThunderShirt- my quaking little dog found her only source of comfort on my pillow- and by my pillow I mean my face. Now - I’d like to think she wanted to be near me for comfort and security, but she also may have been tying to kill me to make sure I wouldn't steal oxygen from her when the storm stole it all.

Trying to get her out the door for our morning walk was a fight, as I don't think she slept at all and she is a mutant who can hold in her pee for 15 hours- she just wanted to stay snuggled in her puff. I dragged her outside- she did her business and pulled me home again so she could sleep. I'm off to work and am dreading the storm we're meant to get tonight.

Gone are the days of sleeping with the windows open. I now sympathize so badly with the author of Marley and Me. I now daydream about living somewhere with a soundproof room so I can tuck her safely inside and go back to enjoying the rain...pipe dreams. 

I used to love thunderstorms. Not anymore.